A common question in my life, it seems. Do I have to be headed somewhere? Anywhere?
Maybe I’m already here? What’s the balance to be had in life between growing and changing and simply being?
The hell, Elizabeth? dear lord — that was about five questions too many to start the day.
Well– in my defense, it has been a hell of a long couple weeks getting ready for the June Squam session — work has been in overdrive and sleep has been in short supply. Not a good combo for this fragile flower.
Am thinking someone is in need of a swim or some time by the lake. Good thing this time next week I will be at Squam and though there’s slim chance I’ll have all my ducks in a row — do I ever? — I will at least be in it and living it and it is a pretty magical place to step into for sure.
So I told you the trip to Paris with Tara was really fun, but I may not have told you that it was also the catalyst for some huge changes in my life. One night, after a super full day where we had been out walking and seeing and being in the city for more than 10 hours– we decided to stay in the apartment and watch a movie.
As it happened I had Romantics Anonymous on my amazon account so we watched that seeing as it was in French, we thought it was appropriate. If you don’t know it (and really, why would you since it’s a bit of an obscure French rom-com?) the story is about hypersensitive people (yeah, I know– I couldn’t relate at all). But you know how it is when you watch something campy with a good friend and a bottle of wine– many jokes and little catch phrases work their way into your conversations and so now, every few days I’ll get a text from Tara and all it will say is a line from the movie when the heroine is being encouraged to be brave: “plonge Angelique! plonge!”
(Translation: Dive in!)
It’s nearly two years since I moved to Providence and I am beginning to feel more brave about connecting with people, getting out, socializing, etc. You’ve been with me long enough to know I find relationships to be so difficult and confusing and also how last year there were some friendships ending that caused real heartbreak. In times past, it might have caused me to head to the hills, but I’m feeling a bit proud to say that although I may have dug down into my den a bit to heal some wounds, I didn’t run away.
I am still here and gaining true strength in myself as I learn to transform these experiences from lead into gold. Of course, ironically, the reason I have been able to do that is due to the extraordinary friends I have in my life who have nurtured me and supported me through this transition.
And, you know– there’s always the puppers.
On another note, have you guys seen these sites? Am really digging on them recently:
Mystic Mama – READ THE SIGNS
REBEKKA SEALE
SUSA TALAN
Gotta fly now– more soonest —
bisous, e
Ah, I get it now. Why I'm being so pushed toward you and Squam. These words explain it perfectly. What good, good things seem to be unfolding. Thank you… and “plonge”- I like it!
~xo
ohhh THANK you Dixie!! I feel such kindred energy from you, too– oxox,e
You ARE already here. Right now. Here.
There is so much more to come and unfold. No worries beyond this moment.
I love you so much and I'm here with you through it all. xo B
<3! We are so similar girl... Want to hang with you this summer. xxo
you are such a beautiful soul. really.
xo
oh BELLA!! you are SO there with me and I am so flipping grateful!
xoox,e
oh YES, ma'am– that is GOING. TO. HAPPEN. yes, it is!!! oxox, e
awwww, Michelle– you love me so good, you really do and that makes my heart feel SO good!! oxox,e
From lead to gold. I love this! I clicked on your links up there and LOVED the signs. Give me a good quote and I am a happy girl.
I am sorry about the heartbreak of lost friendship last year, heartbreak is the word for that. Yuck. I am glad that Providence is providing some roots for you. I will again be with you in spirit at SQUAM. I always am there, I send a little piece of my heart.
Sending love to you…xoxoox
yes yes yes dearest Megsie and I know ONE day you will be there in PERSON, too. til then– sending you big love always, e
Hope the water is lovely x
Those puppers get me every time!! And, I watched Romantics Anonymous and totally related…sigh, so difficult to date for me. C'est la vie! 🙂 Enjoy the mess out of Squam and envision me there in a cowboy hat and red cowboy boots too, cuz that's how I roll sometimes. Oh, and Mystic Mama rocks and I'll check out the other sites to see what's happening there!! xoxo
thank you darling! need to soak my head, pretty much .. . oxox, e
oh so glad you liked the film, too– oh me too — dating is hard. I know some people love it but it definitely brings up all my 'stuff' — but that's the point, right? anyway— love the image of you in cowboy hat and red boots!!! xoxo,e
Yet again a blue heron flew above my path today. Different place and different time of day from the previous fella. Clearly the connection is the coming of Squam.
oh Amy, he is WITH you!!! xoox, e
Random tidbit for you: Just logged into Ravelry and lovveee seeing Squam featured on the front page! 😉
That's all…
Except for this P.S.: You and Christine make Providence sound like the most amazing place on earth! I wish I had spent more time there when my brother was living in Newport. Definitely need to make another trip up—–time for some “plonge-ing” of my own! XOXO
Random tidbit for you: Just logged into Ravelry and lovveee seeing Squam featured on the front page! 😉
That's all…
Except for this P.S.: You and Christine make Providence sound like the most amazing place on earth! I wish I had spent more time there when my brother was living in Newport. Definitely need to make another trip up—–time for some “plonge-ing” of my own! XOXO
Elizabeth–I resonate so deeply with your musings here about sensitivity, balance and self-care, between simply being and taking the “plonge.” Thank you for sharing and thank you, too, for this lovely shout-out. Here's to a real world meet-up soon! xo